I'm on Fire

More fire in Chatham Head last night. Relatively the same area. Just after dark. Two fires set or more likely a second that started off sparks from the first. Many firetrucks. It was hard to keep track of them all, but I think four initially and then another later on. Two of the trucks rushed to the hospital about three quarters of the way through. What is going on over there? Why so many fires in the middle of the night? Kids? Kicks? Something else? I haven't a clue.

I've been thinking a lot about space and particularly change in living space and that theory I mentioned in a previous posting that we bring the pace of our lifestyle wherever we settle. It's true that some spaces are more conducive to work, writing, etc. like my new place for example, much more open for creation than the windowless box that was Sackville. It seems like lately everyone I read about, everyone I know, is running up against the same thing, a change in space doesn't necessarily mean any other sort of life changes. Once a worrier, always a worrier. Once a pack rat, always a pack rat. Same shit, different town.

Yes, I'm in a better setting, a more inspiring setting, but I'm not creating any more than before. Yes, I'm closer to family and friends, but I'm not being any more social than before. And I may in fact be less social because I'm not going to my Mom's every second week for work purposes. I actually see less of the kids now than I did when I was living in Sackville. In essence nothing has changed. Same life, different apartment, different town. Interesting, huh? So yeah, I may have put myself in a space that provides more opportunity for socializing, spending time with the kids, creating, but it still all comes back to me. Nothing will happen unless I make it happen. Whatever that switch is in my head that's keeping me from these things, I need to flick it off.

And so it comes back once again to the fact that change starts within. Without that, nothing happens.

Mood: contemplative
Drinking: coffee, water
Listening To: in view, the tragically hip
Hair: pulled back in a black & white speckled head band, i think my short back has grown out to the same length as my sides, freaky