Monday, October 31, 2005

Dead Like Me

It's amazing what a little Downward-Facing Dog does for an achy breaky back. I'm feeling much better with all the blood rushed to my brain. I'm also a little flushed, had a huge glass of cognac, sipped all evening, lovely stuff. Halloween came and went without so much as the tiniest knock on my door. This means I've chocolate treats to devour all on my own, tsk, tsk, I KNEW I shouldn't have bought anything. We did have several shots fired in the neighbourhood tonight though, which reminded me of home. I wonder if somewhere around here old tires are burning and the road is blocked.

You know the girl on Dead Like Me? George? She reminds me of me when I was a teen, early twenty-something. That attitude! God, did I ever have attitude?! She's a rather annoying character really, but I feel an affinity to her. She looks like one of those troll dolls that used to be so popular back in the days of Cabbage Patch I think . . . (I do hope I've never looked like a troll, but I think I had her fuck you outlook on life for quite a time).

Watched some Sopranos episdodes on dvd tonight (got the rest of the season in the mail today, plus a Marx Bros flick that I'm saving for the weekend). Meadow's boyfriend Fynn reminds me so much of Kevin. I have no idea why, I mean in one episode the guy says more than Kevin did the whole time I knew him, but there's something about him. I dunno, like maybe if Kevin had've opened up a little and revealed some of his feelings, I think he would've talked like this. I suppose he did open up at the end, much too late, but still maybe it was enough to get an inkling into the way he thought . . . or maybe it's just the way his hair flips up . . .

I was reminded today of the Valentine's fiasco involving Kevin. Back in those days I had more feeling toward occasions like that, I had always gotten flowers or teddy bears or jewellry or something from Ronnie. Even in the toughest of times he would at the very least get me a card and some chocolates. But Kevin didn't do the Hallmark holiday, and honestly, now, I would be right with him on that. It's a completely commercial day, has nothing to do with love. But once upon a time my feelings used to be hurt when Valentine's Day passed unacknowledged.

The year that Stacy lived in the house with us, she knew how much this bothered me, so she went behind my back to Kevin and told him he needed at the very least to go get me a card for Valentine's, that this would make me happy. He had no aversion to this, I think it really hadn't crossed his mind before. So he went out to the drugstore and bought a card, came home, signed it with his love and handed it to me.

Imagine my surprise! I was overjoyed. Finally, a Valentine's when I wasn't forgotten. Even though he didn't wait for a private moment to give me the card, but handed it to me in front of everyone in the kitchen, I didn't care -- at least he REMEMBERED! I'm reaching to take the card from him and it's one of those pregnant moments you know, where your heart just swells and there's a zillion thoughts going through your brain in a blink, and you're so surprised at this unexpected turn you don't even know what to say . . . when he says, "Stacy said I should get this for you" and walks away to go watch Wheel of Fortune or something with his dad in the living room.

After that I pretty much decided Valentine's was the stupidest occasion ever.

But don't be too hard on him, his Valentine's etiquette might have been lacking but he kicked ass at surprise treats for no reason at all. He had an uncanny ability to bring me what I wanted or needed, without being asked, and sometimes before I even knew I wanted anything. He did have a natural talent for little surprises, and it wasn't just where I was concerned, he brought home some of the bestest things for other people too.

I raced to the post office today to pick up my latest dvd shipment, credit card bill (blech!), and a parcel with new clothing and sleepwear type stuff for me! How much do I love shopping online?! Having things delivered to me?! It's the best. I got a really good sale. I mean REALLY good! Three bras, two satiny caminsoles (one purple with a pin, the other coral), a green satiny chemise, a vintage Minnie Mouse tee, a vintage Mickey Mouse tank, a turquoise tank with glitter front (that I love!), a lilac tee with glittery pattern on back, and some funky pink sleep pants. And how much did this cost? You're not even going to believe it . . . like $69 bucks, total, free shipping, that's all. I mean a single cheapo bra runs me at least 20 bucks usually . . . so this is a real coup! Gotta love a good deal.

Mood: good
Drinking: water
Listening To: Dead Like Me in the background on the tube
Hair: recently tried on the hats (so cute!)

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